They should really stop the normal rhetoric at both high school and college graduations. Although not in my case, that is where most of the new wave of responsible people hear some motivational speech about taking risks and enjoying the ride. While many of those speeches provide the hope and optimism needed to brave this whole new lifestyle that will never end until the day that you die, they usually miss a fey key points. Today I present to you that missing piece, in the Art, Science and Agony of Adulting.
The art is in the understanding. Social constructs are like grammar, you have to know the rules first to break them. Here is where you can know that it’s polite to bring a gift to the baby shower, but bring cash instead and still be celebrated as a timely and thoughtful gift giver. This also includes knowing just how late to be for church so that for you it only lasts an hour and a half. There’s no right or wrong in doing what you want to do because you’re an Adult…and nobody can stop you.
When you’re an adult, you’re in charge of several things; when and what you eat and how much, what time you go to bed, how many friends you can have over at one time, how many things you can buy in the store. You are also in charge of funding, sourcing and coordinating all of the activities of your life. The science is in measuring your lifestyle with your income and the obligations required to maintain both. This is where lots of people fail. This is why there’s such thing as credit and even more why people deal with “bad credit”. Adulting is not cheap when you try to live a life like the music videos and reality TV shows that you grew up watching (unless you’re strictly a Survivor fan) and most of the time you need a job to do half of the things. That means that you have to figure out what you need to know in order to qualify for the job that aids in creating the lifestyle you want followed by a coordinated effort to secure it through proper networking and application of the acquired knowledge.
Yeah, I know…
Here are some things that can happen when you do too much of one and not enough of the other between The Art & The Science:
Weight gain, Alcoholism, Homelessness, Joblessness, Drug Abuse, Loneliness, Depression and in extreme circumstances even Death.
I remember the first time I got out of the house and out of intense supervision. I was in the Navy and even though we had fitness standards, I’d just spent over 10 weeks only eating food that was provided. When I got the chance to eat at a restaurant again it took me years to stop. I even found a way to go on a diet with restaurant food… why? Because I was grown and nobody could stop me. As I embark on this latest fitness journey, I just wish that somebody had, but that’s not how Adulting works..you’re supposed to just know. Why? Because you’re the adult.
Lately my entire life has been revolving around school and work. I have to literally schedule and budget fun. The stinking trick is, that’s not really how fun works. You can plan a trip to Vegas, but it’s the spontaneous decision to sit through the timeshare presentation that gets you free tickets to see Tyson Beckford naked.
But bills and future money take precedence over right now fun because that’s the formula that we’ve all been taught that keeps us from sleeping on the park bench. So the Agony is in knowing that even though you are totally in control of what you actually do, nobody is going to stop you and also nobody is going to bail you out. It’s a tough pill to swallow this whole Adult thing, and just think, it lasts the rest of your life.
Until next time… may your coloring not rely on the placement of the lines.
This post is dedicated to my Sister Kristol who’s Birthday I’m missing tomorrow because Grown-Up…